When Health Changes Everything
In recent weeks, I was reminded—painfully, vividly—that we never truly know what lies around the next bend.
A professional friend passed away. He was 59. Too young. Too soon.
And as I sat with tearful eyes processing the news, I couldn’t help but notice the parallel paths our lives had taken. We lived in the Ann Arbor area, both with University of Michigan degrees. We’d both spent decades as serial startup CEOs in healthcare. We shared the same core values—integrity, impact, servant leadership. We’d both transitioned to supporting other CEOs as Board Chairs. We enjoyed the same things: exercise, sci-fi movies, travel, family, faith. And for two decades, we’d shared meals together, supporting one another through the endless challenges of building companies.
Perhaps most remarkably, we both found ourselves in operating rooms at Michigan Medicine on the exact same day—May 10, 2022. Mid-50s, leading high-potential startups, confronting frightening medical challenges. He had kidney cancer. I had a brain tumor.
The same day. The same hospital. Two friends, two surgeries, two very different journeys ahead.
When Paths Diverge
Three and a half years have passed since that pivotal May day. Looking back, it’s sobering how differently things turned out.
My meningiomas were fully resected. My recovery was complete. Just a couple weeks ago, I had my third annual follow-up brain MRI. When I met with my neurosurgeon, he told me I was doing so well we could move to less frequent monitoring after three years instead of the typical five. I sat there thanking God for this blessing, feeling the weight of gratitude for my complete recovery.
My friend suffered through repeated cancer recurrences. More surgeries. Difficult complications. The exact same week I got my good news from the neurosurgeon, he succumbed to his cancer.
When I heard, I felt that searing shock that comes when someone you know dies too soon. I remembered our last couple meals together—how we’d shared what we were going through, how health challenges alter your entire perspective on life. How, in those conversations, he’d seemed both weary and determined, fighting a battle none of us could fight for him.
A week later, I attended his memorial service. As I grieved with many others in our local startup ecosystem, the commonalities and contrasts between our paths struck me deeply. We’d started from such similar places. We’d even entered those operating rooms on the same morning. But our journeys diverged in ways neither of us could have predicted or controlled.
What We Don’t See Coming
Here’s what I keep thinking about: when we’re focused on the endless challenges of building a business, our health is often the thing that sideswipes us. A car accident. A cancer diagnosis. An athletic injury. An infection. The list goes on.
As executive leaders, when our bodies seem to be serving us well, we assume they’ll continue to do so. Until suddenly something unexpected happens and we discover just how much we rely on our health as the foundation for everything else.
Life is precious. Make time for what you value beyond your business.
I learned this the hard way. A brush with mortality brings into sharp focus what really matters. Your values snap into place. Your priorities shift. And you realize—often with startling clarity—that your work is rarely the thing you’ll regret as you stare into the jaws of potential death.
If you haven’t experienced something like this yet, take it from those of us who have.
Clarify what you value. When you realize your time may be limited, it gives you deep insight into what really matters to you. Reflect on your life to this point. Contemplate your purpose. What has meaning? Then translate those insights into refined priorities and time allocations.
Notice who prioritizes you. When times get rough, you learn who cares enough to walk the journey with you. Many daily relationships are founded on proximity and convenience. Health crises sift out the chaff and show you the wheat. Those relationships are worth treasuring.
Make time for what matters. Nurture relationships with family and friends. Carve out time for adventures and experiences. Let go of the trivial to make room for the important. Be open to how a health challenge might shift your future plans.
Do Not Take Your Health for Granted
I wish I could tell you that being proactive guarantees good outcomes. It doesn’t. But we can still stack the deck in our favor.
As a business executive, here’s what I’ve learned:
Minimize risk where you can. Health challenges aren’t always in our control, but we can be proactive about managing stress, nutrition, exercise, and preventative care. It’s worth investing precious time in reducing your risk.
Think about key person risk. What would happen if someone was unexpectedly unavailable? Take a few minutes to imagine the impact if a key person got “hit by a bus.” This mental exercise highlights vulnerabilities and enables proactive strengthening of contingency plans, backups, process documentation, and access controls.
Broaden critical relationships. If a relationship with a client, investor, or partner is valuable, introduce other company representatives into the mix. Broaden it beyond a single point of failure. Then, if the unexpected happens, others can step in and carry on those relationships.
One Life to Steward
As we approach the end of this year, I find myself in a season of gratitude and reflection. My choices are more considered now. I seek to steward my life with more wisdom and care.
We each only have one life. Our days are numbered—we just don’t know the count. My friend’s passing reminds me that none of us know how many we’re blessed with. All we can do is step forward and make our choices each day.
I hope you can become more intentional in your choices by stopping to reflect on how fragile and precious life is—rather than needing a health crisis to bring it into focus.
Bless you.
For other posts related to my neurosurgery journey, click on the “Neurosurgery” category at www.StartupCEOReflections.com
